Love Yourself To Love Your Child

Life is GoodThe beginning of the school year is just in a few weeks and I get stressed already. The heavy feeling of overwhelm started to deter my attention from enjoying the warmth of the summer days and coolness of the evenings; the cheerful chirping of the growing wild turkeys roaming through our yard and freshness of the memories of the recent visit to the ocean shores.

Why don’t I just stay calm and content and trust that everything is fine and life is just moving on. Oh, no, this would be not my way. I must be pro-active; I must have registration packet filled in and be the first on that day in school to go through the stations and answer the questions, ask the questions, pay the tuition and sports fees; uniform must be bought and ready; school supplies must be collected and organized;  and so on and so forth, besides dinners planed and cooked, house cleaned, yard tendered and watered. Really? What else?

Don’t you recognize yourself in this swirling tornado funnel of getting ready for a new school year? I know I am not alone.

I cannot support my child to be successful until I start supporting myself to be successful.

When my son was born a dear friend of ours Fran in Australia, told me “Take care of yourself, otherwise who will take care of your son?” Such a nice reminder for this moment, twelve years later.

I need to remind myself again: nothing ever is perfect. Things get done today; tomorrow will take care of itself. I choose to take care of now.

So, now I choose to:

  1. STOP for a moment.
  2. BRING my focus to my heart.
  3. CALM DOWN and listen to my breathing.
  4. WRITE down what I choose to take care of today.
  5. ASK the Universe to take care of me and everybody around me.

My focus is on NOW. My mind is calm. I am breathing in the new vision of my day and letting the overwhelm out. I know I am supported and I am going in the right direction. I do love my child, my husband, my home. Everything is perfect as it is. I move on with the knowing that I am fine and my world is fine too. I allow myself to just stop, look around and see that everything is just the way it is. Peaceful and it is all right. My heart is filled with love energy again.

Now, I can go and cook our dinner and the rest is going to be taken care of when the divine time is ready.

Life is a journey of joy. Embrace it.

Much love.

Lena

Being a Foreigner is a Privilege

Being a foreigner is a privilege.

Why would this thought even come to my mind?

Why would this be even significant?

How do I benefit from thinking like this?

I think everybody who has an opportunity to travel abroad for work, for pleasure, for exploration might consider this: being a foreigner is a privilege.

When I talk about privilege I do not mean entitled, I mean privilege as responsibility, and being humble.

First: coming to a new country we have to remember that we are a different set of habits, traditions, perceptions. This can certainly create some particularities in different situations. It is about how we handle them.

Having lived in Ukraine for half a year, a man from the USA needed to have his car checked. He came to a service station, where he was welcomed, and his concerns were addressed. Everything was great except the mechanics, who worked on his car never smiled and never made an eye contact. A Westerner found this behavior uncomfortable and thought there was something wrong.  In fact, there was nothing wrong. The man gave to the situation a little thought and just moved on with his day. Next time he made an extra effort to find the words of appreciation. As a result, he received a faint smile back and a tight hand shake. The rapport has been established and this foreign man is not so foreign any more, but one of the highly valued clients.

Take away: be friendly and extend an extra effort to make other people comfortable around you.

 

Second: coming to a new country we need to remember that we are representatives of our own culture.

People do profile other people. Living overseas for a while, I could identify, watching other people, where they come from. Manners, ways of talking, body language can reveal, in general, a person’s background.

It is always beneficial to be kind and considerate even though life can be quite challenging at times. As people, we all want to feel safe, healthy, and at peace. It does not matter where we come from, we are all longing for happy lives.

In Dubai, I met a woman. We never talked about our back grounds. I heard her speaking French to other women and I assumed she was French. We communicated in English though. One day, we talked about our kids and I mentioned that I talk Russian to my son. She looked at me and uttered a bit confused: “I thought you are an American, but kind of a different American”. As I found out she was not French either. My dear friend Francesca is from Italy. For me she is a wonderful representative of her culture: bubbly, energetic, generous.

Take away: be a proud representative of your culture and reveal the best side of your personality.

 

Third: when you are in a foreign country make friends with the local people and be appreciative of your experiences.

When we choose to be in a good mood, everything else around us falls in the same vibration. Remember, it is you, who came to this country, you are a guest here. For whatever reason you traveled that far, it was your choice to be there. Do not expect people to pave your sparkling path for you. It can be an arduous work to settle into a new environment and build your little nest for the period of your assignment.

In Turkmenistan, Galina is an office manager. Her job is to manage the office and do a lot of technical stuff. She was the first person I met when I arrived in Ashgabat. The first months were difficult for us with a baby in my hands. Galina had the answers: where to buy American food; diapers/nappies for the child; how to make peanut butter; where to find clothe dryer; which hair dresser to go to; which gym is safe; etc. These are the realities which are not important for people in Turkmenistan. They do not eat American food; many of them cannot afford diapers; they do not use clothe dryers, and going to the gym is not part of the Turkmen culture yet. For me, these are certainly important components for my comfortable life. Galina went far and beyond to help in accommodating my lifestyle to a culture in Turkmenistan.

Take away:   make sense of everything you experience in a new culture and life will smile at you.

 

Life is a journey of joy. Embrace it.

Much love.

Lena

How does it make you feel?

I had a coaching session today with a lady from England. We talked about just general stuff and she constantly would ask me “How do you want to feel?” or “How does this make you feel?”

I am still learning to think by this “feeling” category. I have learnt to do, act, set goals, meet deadlines, achieve. I did not learn to think about how I feel. I found, that nothing that I achieve, makes me feel good, or it makes me feel good for a little bit and then I have more dead lines to meet and goals to accomplish, which are often not about me feeling good. It is often about me doing things “right” or fulfilling my responsibilities or just doing that out of habit.  I have been neglecting the feeling side of my actions.

Why don’t I do, act, achieve because I want to feel certain way? I can go to work because I want to feel fulfilled; I can do dishes, laundry, clean the house because I want to feel organized; I can weed and water the yard because I want to feel happy; I can share my knowledge because I want to feel abundant; I can host a party because I want to feel joyful and generous. How about attaching a feeling to the actions we choose to perform? How does this make me feel? How do I want to feel?

I might just choose to feel first and then act.

Much love.

Lena

Free Quest Flier

Now, when I have got my Law of Attraction life coach certification, I have been thinking: How do I really want to call myself? I know I want to work with world travelers, globe trotters, expatriates – people who move around the globe for work, exploration or other life circumstances.

I decided to Google the word “traveler” to look for synonyms and definitions. I am amazed with the abundance of words that describe the act of moving from place to place. Wanderer, voyager, itinerant, caravan, backpacker, pilgrim, bird of passage – whatever word I choose to call myself as a coach – it is going to be about freedom, journey, and discovery.

My attention was caught by “Frequent flyer” expression. I gave it a little feeling thought and came up with “Free Quest Flier”. How about that? I am a Free Quest Flier Life Coach.

We are on a quest with the intention to feel joyful.

Life is a journey of joy. Embrace it!

Much love,

Lena